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Feeling sad

January 15th, 2011 at 02:52 pm

Yesterday I transferred $300 into savings. I like it when I can do $300. Next month, I can see that I probably won't make it -- my utility bills will be too high.

I'm feeling blue today. I had a bad week at work capped by a really bad day yesterday. I have to face it that people at work don't appreciate what I do and I can't change that. (It's a combination of personalities and unreal expectations.) This is hard for me, because I've always taken pride in my work, and I got used to praise and respect in previous jobs. Something is really wrong here, and I can't put my finger on it. I've applied for another job, but between the economy and my age, chances are slim that I will get it. I have to get into the frame of mind that I am lucky to have a job, however difficult.

I'm also blue that I am alone. I have been alone for a long time, and mostly I am okay with it, but sometimes it hits me, and I think it is now because I don't really have anyone to talk to about how bad I feel. I have my kids, but they don't really want to hear complaining from Mom. My best friend is many miles away, and our relationship has been drifting since I moved away. I haven't made any strong connections here. I've lost my parents and a brother, and my sister is, well, difficult. My one "normal" brother is miles away, and busy with his own life. As I say, mostly I am okay being alone, but when I'm not feeling strong, it hurts.

But on to other things -- today I had a Bavarian clock informally assessed at an antiques/coin fair. I bought it at a garage sale for $10 but I knew it was worth something. The assessor said it was worth $100-200. I think that may be a little low, but it was good to get someone else's opinion. He was quick to say he wasn't a professional assessor, and his interest area was knives, not antiques.

Anyway, I had no interest in selling at that price. It ate up most of my morning. I still wanted to go to Goodwill, but it was noon, so I stopped at Steak N Shake and got a hot dog and fries. ($4.30) Not the healthiest meal, but I didn't want to spend much.

At Goodwill I spent a little over $50. I was in gift-shopping mode, and I found a bunch of things. My best finds were a soft "sueded" shirt for my son's birthday, and a new set of Legos (knights & castles theme) for my grandson. I also found a great porcelain house for my DIL (she collects them)and many other little things. For myself, I found a new Santa for my collection.

On Friday night I went to my son's for a pizza party. My other son's family was there, too, as well as my nephew's family, and my ex and his wife. Pretty wild -- a bunch of kids and a rowdy dog, and the biggest pizza I ever saw. (I brought home enough for two meals).

Speaking of pizza, today I bought a Groupon for Gulliver's pizza, one of my favorites. $10 for $20 worth; it's something I will definitely use.

I'm really glad I have a three-day weekend. I hope that on Tuesday everything will look better.

9 Responses to “Feeling sad”

  1. EnglishTeacher Says:

    Hey there,

    I'm sorry about your bad week. Feeling sad and alone is obviously no fun.

    Best wishes,

  2. Looking Forward Says:

    May the three day weekend make you feel 100% better! Big Grin

  3. LuckyRobin Says:

    I'm sorry you are feeling blue. Feel better soon.

  4. nmboone Says:

    I'm also sorry that you feel lonely. I wish there was someone there for you more. Maybe you can remind your kids to call more? Just a thought but I don't know. Also maybe think about your accomplishments. I sure wish I could have put 300 in my savings this month! January was a very expensive month for me: Contacts, glasses, and flea and heartworm treatments for only four months and that was nearly 80! Dogs are expensive. I hope I can save a little from my next check. And great find on the pizza! I haven't bought anything from Groupon though I get emails every day. Just haven't seen anything I want yet. Feel better soon!

  5. Savings Queen Says:

    CB, I totally empathize with what you are feeling as I am a little blue today too as my DH is out of town for a week. I also know what it's like to drift away from a girlfriend as who I thought was my "BFF" recently called a "time out" from our friendship of 25 years. It was for a very silly reason too and something which truly was not my fault. When I get like this I try to remember to truly count my blessings and thank God for them. It sounds like you do have a really good family there with great kids and grandkids. Bless you. I am glad you got some good finds today...that's always fun! Maybe you should watch a movie tonight. For myself, I am watching Sex and the City reruns! Please do have a good night. I enjoyed your sharing.

  6. rob62521 Says:

    I'm sorry you are blue...it might also stem from our dreary Illinois weather too. Hope you have a good weekend and that next week is a more positive one for you.

  7. laura Says:


    I think it is just one of "those" weeks. As you know from my Thursday post, my day was really bad, too. Too much sad stuff going on all at once. My spirits have returned, but it mostly because of the kids. Because we are so close in proximity, maybe some Saturday we should meet up at some place on Roosevelt Road for a quick frugal lunch and then go to Goodwill. Anhow, just an idea!

    And where is a Gullivers? I saw the Groupon today and had NO idea where those are located?

    I also second what frugal foodie above says about the IL weather! Enough to plummet even the happiest of spirits lately. Hope tomorrow is better!

  8. Miz Pat Says:

    I was lonley today and I read your post and now I find myself smiling. Thank you for sharing.

  9. CB in the City Says:

    Thanks, everyone. What a great site this is, when you can sign in and whine and everyone is kind. I feel like you are all my friends.

    I feel a lot better today. I watched Wayne Dyer on PBS and he always inspires me. Then I watched "The Duchess" on Netflix and her life was so awful I couldn't help but feel lucky!

    Laura, Gulliver's is on the corner of Roosevelt and Villa in Lombard (?) I'm never sure where one suburb ends and another begins! There's also one up near Skokie that I go to with my kids.

    I think it would be great to meet up one day! I will be out of town next weekend but after that name the day!

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